The rickshaw drove Feng Shizhen to the front of the Old City alleys. The Rong family already paid in advance, but Feng Shizhen still threw one jiao1 to the driver.
The alleys were lined with aging shikumen2 houses, crowded together like an ant’s nest. The passageway had a rope hung above, currently used to dry out bed sheets and children’s diapers. Water droplets dripped down onto the alleys below. The air was filled with the acidic stench of excrement and compost.
A group of teenagers were playing with a leather ball in the stinky puddles on the side of the road, splashing muddy water all over themselves. Their mothers ran out with a wok spatula in hand and erupted in a fit of rage, pinching their ears and dragging them back.
Before Feng Shizhen was about to enter the courtyard, she heard the intense argument coming from within.
Widow Zhang’s characteristic hoarse and noisy voice was particularly distinct.
“How shameless are you to bully a widow in broad daylight? You couldn’t even leave this little bit of paste alone, are you trying to force me to die? What’s so impressive about being doctors? Didn’t everything still burn down? Don’t you still have to come and squeeze into this little place with us? Go and accumulate some karma for your old man back home.
You’re asking to be struck by lightning!”
“I didn’t… you clearly knocked it down yourself…”
Feng Shizhen keenly caught the sound of her own mother’s aggrieved weep and immediately blood rushed up to her head. Taking large steps, she rushed in.
There were a group of older ladies encircling something in the courtyard, whispering and pointing. With one hand, Feng Shizhen created a path through the group and saw Widow Zhang currently pulling on Madam Feng’s hand without letting go. Madam Feng’s pale face was thoroughly flushed red as she repeatedly wiped her tears.
“Take your hands off of her!” Feng Shizhen hollered. She rushed in like an eagle, pushing Widow Zhang into a stagger and protecting her mother behind her.
The crowd erupted into a greater clamor, even more excited about how interesting and intense the situation has turned in the battlefield.
“Mom, what happened?” Feng Shizhen fished out a handkerchief for her mother to wipe her face. Her voice rised sharply, “She hit your face?”
Madam Feng was a weak and thin woman. She usually spoke softly, but at this moment, her voice trembled from shame and anger.
“I saw that the sun was out, so I went and hung our blanket in the courtyard. She… she said our blanket covered the sun and blocked her paste, so she went and ripped our blanket off. The blanket fell and knocked off her paste…”
There was a pool of sticky and gooey chili paste on the floor, stepped all over. The blanket, however, was in Madam Feng’s arms. There was a huge lump of chili paste stained on the show-white blanket.
At this moment, Widow Zhang rejoined the battlefield with a vicious ferocity. With a pounce, she grabbed Feng Shizhen.
Feng Shizhen immediately pushed Madam Feng back and agilely evaded her. She raised a hand and slapped Widow Zhang’s face.
“I’m returning this slap back.”
Widow Zhang was taken by surprise and took a step back, stepping right into her own paste. She wasn’t even able to touch a strand of Feng Shizhen’s hair before slipping and falling on her back.
The bystanders all roared into a boisterous laughter and started to clap in succession. Widow Zhang had caused troubles for the rest of the neighbors for quite some time already, so everyone was extremely delighted seeing her suffer today.
Widow Zhang fell hard enough that she couldn’t get up momentarily. Instead, she continued laying on the ground, kicking her feet, crying and yelling, “Someone’s dead! She murdered someone! Go call the police!”
Feng Shizhen crossed her arm and smiled coldly, “Even if I did kill someone, then there needs to be a corpse. You might as well die right now to spare the police from wasting their time!”
Widow Zhang didn’t expect the cultured and refined Feng Shizhen to not only hit hard but also be that malicious. She was stunned for a few seconds before reacting, yelling hysterically, “They’re bullying a widow! They’re bullying a widow! This little girl not only slapped me but also cursed me to death. Everyone look here! How can people still live in this type of world!”
Ever since Feng Shizhen moved in, she maintained the refined and cultured appearance of a female teacher. This was the first time her neighbors have ever seen her angry and speak harshly. They were so shocked, even their view of her has changed.
A nosy old lady came out to criticize Feng Shizhen, “You shouldn’t hit your elders. On top of that, she’s also a widow…”
Showing indignance on her face, Feng Shizhen rebutted back, “The evil one is always the first one to complain. She accidentally knocked her own paste down, what does that have to do with my family? So what if she’s a widow? Everyone lets her do whatever she wants. It’s not like we’re the one who caused her husband to die!”
This comment went straight to her heart. Widow Zhang threw her slippers to the side and burst into sobs, “Bullying someone just because you’re educated. How can you be this vicious?”
Madam Feng was so enraged she wanted to argue back, but Feng Shizhen stopped her, yelling back loudly herself, “Just because you’re older, doesn’t mean you’re worthy of respect. You think that our family is easy to bully just because we’re poor now. In the past, you stole our family’s dried fish and picked vegetables. When we caught you red-handed, you wouldn’t admit it either. And yet you dare come here and make a scene today? I tolerated you some in the past because you’re a widow but today you’ve gone too far. How dare you even hit my mom! I’m going to put my foot down today. Although our family has nothing left besides the old, weak, and disabled, we aren’t afraid! If you push us any further, we’ll go down with you too! If you even dare touch my family, I will chop off one of your arms! If you even throw one piece of garbage in front of our house, I will burn your house down! I, Feng Shizhen, am younger than you. I have the time and effort to handle you all!”
The resentment and determination in Feng Shizhen’s eyes burned like a flaming inferno. Widow Zhang was so intimidated, she was unable to utter a sound.
Feng Shizhen glanced coldly at the crowd and they all took a step back. Holding onto Madam Feng, she pushed aside the crowd and walked into the building.
Heavy discussion ensued behind them. Widow Zhang prattled weakly, “I thought she looked quite educated. How is she actually this ferocious, where did all of her teaching go?”
Feng Shizhen turned around and walked back. Standing at the entrance of the stairs, she shouted back sternly, “Did you think just because I’m educated, I will just stand there and not argue back when I am bullied? Do educated people owe you anything? If it’s like this, I’d rather not be seen as an educated person. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. From today on, if anyone dares bully my family, I will make you pay back a hundredfold!”
She pulled Madam Feng into the house and slammed the door shut.
The courtyard was in absolute silence as the crowd dispersed.
After they entered the house, Feng Shizhen slumped into her rattan chair and started to pant.
Madam Feng helped pour her a cup of herbal tea and sat on the side, tearing the blanket apart. Feng Shizhen downed the entire cup of herbal tea before finally letting out a sigh of satisfaction. She propped her head up with her hand and started laughing softly.
She graduated from a prestigious college and was a respectable female teacher. Even if her family’s situation was getting worser by the day, she still maintained a dignified and elegant appearance in front of others. If not for what happened today, she would still not know how tiring it actually was to pretend in front of everyone.
Feng Shizhen was suddenly regretful there was no alcohol at home, or she’d be able to have a drink right now.
The Feng family originally opened a medical shop in the Hongkou district. It was a decent size and had three or four employees, two doctors, and one accountant. Mr. Feng would also help treat some minor illnesses. Their revenue was good enough to allow their daughter to attend college in Nanjing, but also their son to study abroad.
It was a pity, a fire broke out in the neighborhood and burned down half of the streets, including the shop and their residence. To save a few precious editions of medical books, Mr. Feng broke his leg from a fallen beam and even sustained third degree burns. They spent all of their savings on her father’s treatment. Currently, they live in a house on the second floor of the Shikumen with one enclosed room and three open rooms. They rented one of the rooms that faced the outside to an older lady that did odd jobs to raise her child.
Madam Feng sighed, “A lot of our neighbors are nice people. I’m scared people will start calling you a shrew.”
“Mom,” Feng Shizhen said, “In this world, you can’t always be nice. If you don’t fight back a little, people would always think we’re easy to bully. If it wasn’t Widow Zhang today, then it would be Widow Li tomorrow. There will always be someone that will think they can get the better of us. Is anyone able to put up with these kinds of petty conflicts forever. It’s better to stop it once and for all. When in Rome, you got to do what the Romans do. Wait until our circumstances get better, we’ll move out of here and live in a better neighborhood. It won’t be too late for your daughter to be prim and proper then.”
Madam Feng was a gentle, lenient, and indecisive lady. After the accident, all the family’s affairs were handled by her daughter. She merely listened and followed for daughter for everything.
The sound of her father’s coarse coughing came from the room facing north. It was only then Feng Shizhen noticed the thick odor remnants in the air from burning opium. Her anger rose again immediately. She said to Madam Feng, “Did you help dad buy more opium? He hasn’t even recovered from his injuries yet, smoking opium is bad for him!”
Madam Feng rubbed her hands helplessly, “Your dad said he was in excruciating pain, what could I do? At least he’s able to sleep well after smoking it.”
“Didn’t we get painkillers from the doctor before?” Feng Shizhen said, “Dr. Li also said that dad’s injury is a lot better now, so it shouldn’t hurt that much anymore. I’m afraid dad’s already dependent on using medicine for the pain. Mom, we should help dad quit opium.”
Madam Feng looked down in silence.
Feng Shizhen felt helpless. She passed over the ten yuan she received at the Rong residence and said solemnly, “This is half of my wage. Mom, use it for the household expenses.”
Madam Feng pushed the money back, “Two of your dad’s old friends came to visit this morning. They brought some medicine with them, and even insisted I keep fifty yuan. You keep the money. When you’re living at your employer’s place, you’ll inevitably need to use some to appease the servants.”
“I’m a poor private tutor. Even if I don’t try to appease them, what could happen?” Feng Shizhen pushed the money back,
“Don’t buy any more opium for dad. I know you love him, but this is hurting him!”
Madam Feng could only take money. She said, “I received a telegram from your brother this morning. He’s already on the ship and would take half a month before he’s back.”
Feng Shizhen was anxious, “He officially dropped out of school. Now that he’s back, I’m worried there will be no opportunity for him to go back in the future.”
Madam Feng was happy instead, missing her son dearly, “Now that the family’s going to be together again, we won’t have anything to worry about. With your brother, everything will get better. There needs to be a man supporting this household. If your brother was around, we wouldn’t have fallen so low that we would need to be neighbors with such a shrew.”
For the past few months, Feng Shizhen had rushed around trying to manage the household. Treating her father, searching for a new residence, working part time to earn money—she single-handedly supported the entire household.
But in her mother’s eyes, it was still nothing in comparison to her brother that was abroad and did nothing to help the family. She felt bitterness and aggrieved at heart and did not anything for a long period of time.
Once she mentioned her son, Madam Feng couldn’t stop talking about him. Washing the bed sheets, she muttered, “Your brother was a top student at medical school. Even if he didn’t manage to graduate, it wouldn’t be hard for him to find a job at the hospital. We’ll be able to move away from here then. Oh, are your new employers kind?”
“They’re alright.” Feng Shizhen’s enthusiasm was waning, “Mom, is there something to eat?”
After Madam Feng heard her daughter didn’t eat lunch, she hastily rubbed her hands and went to prepare noodles for her.
Feng Shizhen went into the room to change her father’s gauze. Mr. Feng woke up groggily, and called out instinctively, “Shixun…”
Feng Shizhen leaned close to his ear, “Brother’s still on his way back.”
After Mr. Feng realized it was his daughter, there was a flash of disappointment on his face, “Why haven’t you left yet?”
Leave to where? Leave her injured father and run away?
Feng Shizhen smiled bitterly.
“Dad found me, remember?” Feng Shizhen pressed her face against the back of her father’s only intact hand, her gaze scattered, “I didn’t even drown to death in the river that year, how could I be defeated by something like this?”
1 A jiao is a unit of currency equivalent to 1/10th of a yuan.
2 Shikumen is a traditional Shanghainese architectural style with high brick walls and a narrow front yard. Something like:
Chibi’s Closet 
Thank you, thank you, thank you ! ☺️
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I’m watching the drama now and I read the book a a lot better, since they messed up the last 1/4. Thank you so much for your hard work. I’m very happy! 😊
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